On God and things
I think I’ve finally come to the conclusion that I don’t believe in God. I believe in humanity, I believe in community, I believe in working hard and honestly, I believe in luck. I don’t believe that my path has been set out for me; my path is made by my work and by luck.
I grew up in the Episcopal church. I really like the Episcopal church, and I think that will always be my spiritual home, and I like the stories that are told as sermons, that focus on being good people. I love the music. I REALLY love the camps and all my memories of it. But as a grown-up, I see the Bible stories as just that, stories. Fables, fairy tales, myths…all used to explain what was unknown. The unknown is scary, but what I find to be really scary is refusing to learn more about our world and and allowing our understanding of the past to evolve. Was there a person who lived the life ascribed to Jesus? Maybe…but it doesn’t matter, there are a lot of people who have done good things and were killed/died before their time. Did a deity create the world in 6 days and rest on the 7th and create man from dust and woman from man’s rib? Oh for pete’s sake NO!
So what if I’m wrong? It shouldn’t matter, because I live my life in a way that benefits my community. I am kind, I am helpful, I am loving, I parent my children with those values. I help those who have less than I have, I am a shoulder to cry on when a friend is sad, I’m a person who can make a friend smile, I’m there in the middle of the night when a friend has amazing news and just needs to tell someone. That is who I am, regardless of if God exists. If there is a heaven and the ONLY difference between me getting in and not getting in is if I believe in God…well…that’s pretty messed up and that’s not what I want to play.
Tonight when I was putting Princess Ahem to bed, she told me that General Tank told her there was a special secret lab that she could get to and that she wanted to believe him but she also didn’t. When I told her that I couldn’t tell her what to believe, she responded that I could, I could tell her she was Christian and she believed in God. I think it blew her mind when I told her that I could tell her that our family, generally, is considered Christian, but that I absolutely could not tell her whether or not she believed in God. And so it begins, she is learning that grown ups CAN’T tell her what she believes. I hope this will be the first in a number of realizations that she has a mind of her own and I fully expect her to use it.
And for your happy picture(s) of the day…This is middle console surfing as demonstrated by T4. We have to sit for an hour while Princess Ahem has choir and we’re starting to go a little stir crazy with all the inside togetherness lately. So we had a dance party. In the car. And T4 was the surfer. And demanded I take a picture, not only of the top half, but of his feet….so you’d all know he was surfing.